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Stephanie Cawthon - The University of Texas at Austin The Perks of Being Disabled Another theme that emerged was that students years (Bettinger, ), and poor performance Stephanie, an international student and a. Bimbisar Irom, Porismita Borah, Stephanie Gibbons Visual Framing of the Rohingya Fabienne Labbé, Catherine Pelletier, Julie A. Bettinger, Janet Curran. LAY BETTING EXPLAINED VARIANCE

Our work to create an extraordinary coeducational institution is unfinished. It is hard to quarrel with the notion of girls and boys mixing in classes, sports, performing arts, Paresky Commons for dinner, and endless clubs and activities for their mutual benefit and instruction when you see and experience their largely 36 Andover Spring aspires to merge separate wonderful traditions, dating back centuries. We still argue over the structural forces that come with those traditions.

Should a talented male or female dancer get a varsity letter or course credit, neither or both? As the voices of our own students remind us every year, we are still in the process of merging Abbot Academy and Phillips Academy. We push school. Academy is a choice to spend their high The interrelated concerns of gender, school years in a very particular environment.

Students who enroll here will race, class, religion, and sexuality, among others, are some of the hardest come to a school that will push them topics that students will be forced to in ways that few other places will. We grapple with at Phillips Academy—and are not perfect at Phillips Academy.

Phillips to what a student must have upon Academy is a distinctive place, with graduation. These events are intended to both celebrate and reflect on the historic merger of Abbot and Phillips academies, highlight some important Abbot Academy programs and traditions that continue to be embraced at PA today, and inspire further conversations about coeducation and gender.

May 24—Softball Field Dedication. Festivities, free of charge and open to all, are slated to include speakers, a cookout, and live music. Today, Balling and her group of teens known collectively as El Equipo Non Sibi del Tolima travel to villages separated by mountain ranges, building playgrounds, hosting youth summits, and bringing toys to younger kids.

Balling, a native of Lee, New Hampshire, had spent time working in the finance and tech industries in Manhattan, as well as doing some screenwriting in Los Angeles, before moving to Colombia a halfdozen years ago. Touring as an assistant in a Senate campaign in the department of Tolima in , she was approached by members of a youth group who wanted to talk about some much-needed improvements to their mountain village, Villahermosa.

Balling was unsure at first how she could help, but on the long drive to the village she suddenly recalled that just the day before she had received an e-mail from Andover about alumni non sibi—based projects. Community service was nothing new to Balling, who had served as a candy striper in a Boston hospital during her years at PA, as a Big Sister to a young Dominican girl in Harlem while at Barnard, and as a Red Cross volunteer after Hurricane Katrina.

The summit gave them a safe place to discuss the issues. Participants, including young as 6 participating in the decision-making Balling, traveled by helicopter to Santiago process, a location was chosen; residents of all Perez, a village in southern Tolima, where they ages pitched in to clean, paint, and construct delivered to peers 1, soccer balls all labeled the new playground. A designated inauguration non sibi and 1, teddy bears. There, they taught a new of young people, some of whom have been with group of kids how to do the exact same thing: site and build a playground.

Those teenagers then did the same in another village, and so on. They own it. The most recent summit, in November , was held just as the Colombian government was beginning negotiations with the FARC; participants established a mock advisory committee. The conflict, says Balling, is very real to the majority of them—some have family members in the FARC while others have been displaced by the Balling and her young team gather in June to inaugurate the new Non Sibi playground built in Morales, Cauca, Colombia.

Andover Spring 39 her since the beginning. Many of the kids have branched out, undertaking their own non sibi works and raising any associated funds needed. He also realized that simply by providing local people with mentors and preliminary financing, he could positively affect their lives while empowering them to care for irreplaceable fragments of their history.

Julio Ibarrola second from left , a master potter, cooperative leader, and teacher, trains the young men. Coben, a native of Livingston, New Jersey, then decided that rather than founding another startup, he would nurture a longstanding interest in archaeology. Returning to school, he earned a PhD degree in anthropology with a focus in archaeology from the University of Pennsylvania. He conducted his dissertation research at Incallajta, an Incan site in central Bolivia some miles from the nearest major city, and was alarmed to discover that the site was being used to grow crops, play soccer, and graze cattle.

He was met with skepticism, but in the first week four tourists passed through the gate; the second week, three more came, by which point, the project already had achieved a 40 percent return. Suddenly, the populace developed a new attitude toward the site. His long-term goal is to be in sites in Asia, the Middle East, and Africa by Before the crisis in Syria, SPI was ready to go to Jordan, but because tourism has fallen in the region, Coben says it would be something of a false promise to the Jordanian people to set up anything now.

Based there are 35 women who otherwise would have had few economic opportunities; they have been newly trained in business and artisanal skills. Yet Coben is quick to note that SPI is not an aid organization. These are extraordinary people. They just need extraordinary opportunity. Andover Spring 41 that were welcoming to students for whom they were tradition—a sukkah, or hut, for the harvest festival Sukkot and a mandala in the center of campus—they also appealed to students who were less familiar with them.

But five years later, there was no such interesting pattern, and his daughters searched for an appropriate way to honor the man, a gesture that would be a celebration of his legacy. The Gendler Grapevine was born. With the money, they built organic gardens, installed low-flow toilets, and hired fellows to teach campers about the environment. This year, the board hopes to double that amount. Mary Gendler and Rabbi Everett Gendler are seated. The selection of recipients is not arbitrary, she says, explaining that board members look for high-leverage, low-cost projects.

So the camps reached some 10, kids directly, but the campers then took the ideas home, for a net reach of perhaps 50, people. That the home. One of the most compelling aspects of the Gendler Grapevine is that Tamar and Naomi reached out to former PA classmates and other alums whom they knew had had some connection with their father during their years on campus, inviting them to be a part of the project.

Held April 25 and 26, Non Sibi Weekend is the new model for Non Sibi Day, which was founded in and involved campus, local, and worldwide service projects. Following is an edited version of their conversation. I wondered why. But the turning point really came a few years later when I wanted to build a fund with some friends Kluge: There are few issues in the world that have the potential to invest in sanitation entrepreneurs.

In that many businesses, we had to ask why. If you care about underserved market and a hugely neglected opportunity. Ko: In an interview with Ashoka [www. What was the turning point with toilets and sanitation for you? Ko: Toilet Hackers has a humorous approach to marketing and advocating.

Are there ever any questions or challenges when using humor? I realbecome effective at communicating or advocating on behalf 44 Andover Spring of a neglected issue. You have to stick out your neck and take the risk that someone may not like. In which case, generally, you find out. Ko: As one of the guiding hands of the toilet team, have you become a toilet connoisseur?

Do you check out toilets wherever you go? Kluge: All the time. I think all people want their own toilet. Kluge: For me, the best toilet is one that is safe and waterless, that is not polluting its environment, and that is being used by its local community. What does that mean? I consider myself moments. Being a rebel with a cause. The combination of love of humanity and you were a student here, and is it influencing you now? Two, you need to be highly collaborative.

You need to be fearless. Now non sibi is what I do. The other piece is attitude. Building a business is hard enough, but solving a wicked problem while trying to do For more information, follow ToiletHackers on Twitter or visit www. It is evident that, in many ways, the debate over hair was a proxy for larger issues of race, class, and identity. Though intergenerational conflict was a hallmark of the time, this conflict was uniquely heightened at Andover, where, thanks to the progressive vision of Headmaster John Kemper, the student body had never been more diverse— but the boys were forced to operate within the confines of what was still, at heart, a highly traditional institution.

Marine on leave from Vietnam. Police broke it up with pepper spray. The facts of that event have actually never been documented. And frankly, over the years I preferred to just let it go. I carved a peace sign on a bar of soap, and stamped it on strips of torn bedsheets. In fact, I had not heard of any pamphlets being handed out. They were also shoving and hitting the students who wore them. One PA student it was later reported was sent to the hospital with a concussion.

I turned, and he went by me and fell down forward. I lost balance and fell on top of him. I tried to keep him from doing so. None of them was in uniform. I got a brief peripheral glimpse of a cop. You could hear him above the crowd noise. It's worth noting that this effect has been studied extensively by the scientific literature and has a relatively large body of data confirming its presence across multiple hallucinogens.

These include LSD , [] mescaline , [] psilocybin , [] cannabis , [] ketamine , [] and nitrous oxide. Thought acceleration Main article: Thought acceleration Thought acceleration also known as racing thoughts [] is defined as the experience of thought processes being sped up significantly in comparison to that of everyday sobriety. Thoughts while undergoing this effect are not necessarily qualitatively different, but greater in their volume and speed.

However, they are commonly associated with a change in mood that can be either positive or negative. It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of stimulant and nootropic compounds, such as amphetamine , methylphenidate , modafinil , and MDMA. Wakefulness Main article: Wakefulness Wakefulness is defined as an increased ability to stay conscious without feeling sleepy combined with a decreased need to sleep.

However, it is worth noting that the few compounds which selectively induce this effect without a number of other accompanying effects are referred to as eugeroics or wakefulness-promoting agents. These include modafinil [] [] [] [] and armodafinil. This page lists and describes the various cognitive suppressions which can occur under the influence of certain psychoactive compounds.

Addiction suppression Main article: Addiction suppression Addiction suppression is defined as the experience of a total or partial suppression of a psychological addiction to a specific substance and the cravings associated with it. This can occur as an effect which lasts long after the compound which induced it wears off or it can last only while the compound is still active. Addiction suppression is a rare effect that is most commonly associated with psychedelics , [31] psilocin , [] LSD , [] ibogaine [] and N-acetylcysteine NAC.

This typically results in feelings of extreme calmness and relaxation. Anxiety suppression is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as disinhibition and sedation. It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of anxiolytic compounds which primarily include GABAergic depressants , [] [] such as benzodiazepines , [] alcohol , [] GHB , [] and gabapentinoids []. However, it can also occur to a lesser extent under the influence of a large variety of other pharmacological classes which include but are not limited to cannabinoids , [] dissociatives , [] SSRIs , and opioids.

Disinhibition Main article: Disinhibition Disinhibition is medically recognized as an orientation towards immediate gratification, leading to impulsive behavior driven by current thoughts, feelings, and external stimuli, without regard for past learning or consideration of future consequences. At its lower levels of intensity, disinhibition can allow one to overcome emotional apprehension and suppressed social skills in a manner that is moderated and controllable for the average person.

This can often prove useful for those who suffer from social anxiety or a general lack of self-confidence. However, at higher levels of intensity, the disinhibited individual may be completely unable to maintain any semblance of self-restraint, at the expense of politeness, sensitivity, social appropriateness, or local laws and regulations. This lack of constraint can be negative, neutral, or positive depending on the individual and their current environment.

The negative consequences of disinhibited behaviour range from relatively benign consequences such as embarrassing oneself to destructive and damaging ones such as driving under the influence or committing criminal acts.

Disinhibition is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as amnesia and anxiety suppression in a manner which can further decrease the person's observance of and regard for social norms. It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of GABAergic depressants , such as alcohol , [] benzodiazepines , [] phenibut , and GHB. However, it may also occur under the influence of certain stimulants , [] entactogens , [] and dissociatives [].

Dream suppression Main article: Dream suppression Dream suppression is defined as a decrease in the vividness, intensity, frequency, and recollection of a person's dreams. At its lower levels, this can be a partial suppression which results in the person having dreams of a lesser intensity and a lower rate of frequency. However, at its higher levels, this can be a complete suppression which results in the person not experiencing any dreams at all.

Dream suppression is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of cannabinoids [] and most types of antidepressants [] [] []. This is due to the way in which they increase REM latency, decrease REM sleep, reduce total sleep time and efficiency, and increase wakefulness. For example, an individual who is currently feeling somewhat anxious or emotionally unstable may begin to feel very apathetic, neutral, uncaring, and emotionally blank.

This also impacts the degree to which the person will express their emotional state through body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions. It is worth noting that although a reduction in the intensity of one's emotions may be beneficial at times e. It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of antipsychotic compounds, such as quetiapine , haloperidol , and risperidone.

Focus suppression Main article: Focus suppression Focus suppression also known as distractability [] is medically recognized as a decreased ability to selectively concentrate on an aspect of the environment while ignoring other things.

It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate or heavy dosages of antipsychotics , [] benzodiazepines , cannabinoids , [21] and hallucinogens. However, it is worth noting that stimulant compounds which primarily induce focus enhancement at light to moderate dosages will also often lead into focus suppression at their heavier dosages. Memory suppression is a process which may be broken down into the 4 basic levels described below: Partial short-term memory suppression - At the lowest level, this effect is a partial and potentially inconsistent failure of a person's short-term memory.

It can cause effects such as a general difficulty staying focused , an increase in distractibility, and a general tendency to forget what one is thinking or saying. Complete short-term memory suppression - At this level, this effect is the complete failure of a person's short-term memory. It can be described as the experience of being completely incapable of remembering any specific details regarding the present situation and the events leading up to it for more than a few seconds.

This state of mind can often result in thought loops , confusion , disorientation, and a loss of control, especially for the inexperienced. At this level, it can also become impossible to follow both conversations and the plot of most forms of media. Partial long-term memory suppression - At this level, this effect is the partial, often intermittent failure of a person's long-term memory in addition to the complete failure of their short-term memory.

It can be described as the experience of an increased difficulty recalling basic concepts and autobiographical information from one's long-term memory. Compounded with the complete suppression of short term memory, it creates an altered state where even basic tasks become challenging or impossible as one cannot mentally access past memories of how to complete them. For example, one may take a longer time to recall the identity of close friends or temporarily forget how to perform basic tasks.

This state may create the sensation of experiencing something for the first time. At this stage, a reduction of certain learned personality traits, awareness of cultural norms, and linguistic recall may accompany the suppression of long-term memory.

Complete long-term memory suppression - At the highest level, this effect is the complete and persistent failure of both a person's long and short-term memory. It can be described as the experience of becoming completely incapable of remembering even the most basic fundamental concepts stored within the person's long-term memory.

This includes everything from their name, hometown, past memories, the awareness of being on drugs, what drugs even are, what human beings are, what life is, that time exists, what anything is, or that anything exists. Memory suppression of this level blocks all mental associations, attached meaning, acquired preferences, and value judgements one may have towards the external world.

Sufficiently intense memory loss is also associated with the loss of a sense of self, in which one is no longer aware of their own existence. In this state, the user is unable to recall all learned conceptual knowledge about themselves and the external world, and no longer experiences the sensation of being a separate observer in an external world.

This experience is commonly referred to as "ego death". Memory suppression is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as thought loops , personal bias suppression , amnesia , and delusions. It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of hallucinogenic compounds, such as psychedelics , dissociatives , and deliriants. In contrast, amnesia does not directly affect the usage of one's short or long-term memory during its experience but instead renders a person incapable of recalling events after it has worn off.

A person experiencing memory suppression cannot access their existing memory, while a person with drug-induced amnesia cannot properly store new memories. As such, a person experiencing amnesia may not obviously appear to be doing so, as they can often carry on normal conversations and perform complex tasks. This is not the case with memory suppression. Personal bias suppression Main article: Personal bias suppression Personal bias suppression also called cultural filter suppression is defined as a decrease in the personal or cultural biases, preferences, and associations which a person knowingly or unknowingly filters and interprets their perception of the world through.

The suppression of this innate tendency often induces the realization that certain aspects of a person's personality, world view and culture are not reflective of objective truths about reality, but are in fact subjective or even delusional opinions. Personal bias suppression is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as conceptual thinking , analysis enhancement , and especially memory suppression.

It is most commonly induced under the influence of heavy dosages of hallucinogens such as dissociatives and psychedelics. However, it can also occur to a much lesser extent under the influence of very heavy dosages entactogens and cannabinoids. Sleepiness Main article: Sleepiness Sleepiness also known as drowsiness is medically recognized as a state of near-sleep, or a strong desire for sleep without feeling a decrease in one's physical energy levels. It results in a propensity for tired, clouded, and sleep-prone behaviour.

This can lead into a decreased motivation to perform tasks, as the increase in one's desire to sleep begins to outweigh other considerations. Prolonged exposure to this effect without appropriate rest can lead to cognitive fatigue and a range of other cognitive suppressions. Sleepiness is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of a wide variety of compounds such as cannabinoids , [] GABAergic depressants , [] [] opioids , [] antipsychotics , [] [] some antihistamines , [] and certain psychedelics.

However, it is worth noting that the few compounds which selectively induce this effect without a number of other accompanying effects are referred to as hypnotics. Suggestibility suppression Main article: Suggestibility suppression Suggestibility suppression is defined as a decreased tendency to accept and act on the suggestions of others. A common example of suggestibility suppression in action would be a person being unwilling to believe or trust another person's suggestions without a greater amount of prior discussion than would usually be considered necessary during every day sobriety.

Although this effect can occur as a distinct mindstate, it may also arise due to interactions between a number of other effects. For example, a person who is currently experiencing mild paranoia combined with analysis enhancement may find themselves less trusting and more inclined to think through the suggestions of others before acting upon them, alternatively, a person who is experiencing ego inflation may find that they value their own opinion over others and are therefore equally less likely to follow the suggestions of others.

Alcohol has been shown to decrease suggestibility in a dose-dependent manner, [] [] while its withdrawals increases suggestibility. This has to be taken into account when investigative interviews are planned and conducted, and when the reliability of the information derived from such interviews is evaluated. It is most commonly induced under the influence of GABAergic depressants. When experiencing this effect, it will feel as if the time it takes to think a thought and the amount of time which occurs between each thought has been slowed down to the point of greatly impairing cognitive processes.

It can manifest itself in delayed recognition, slower reaction times, and fine motor skills deficits. Thought deceleration is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as analysis suppression and sedation in a manner which not only decreases the person's speed of thought, but also significantly decreases the sharpness of a person's mental clarity.

It is most commonly induced under the influence of heavy dosages of depressant compounds, such as GABAergics , [] [] [] antipsychotics , [] and opioids. Although many transpersonal and psychological effects also technically fit into this definition, they are excluded from this category of effects as they have their own defining qualities which standard novel states do not. This page lists and describes the various novel states which can occur under the influence of certain psychoactive compounds.

Cognitive dysphoria Main article: Cognitive dysphoria Cognitive dysphoria semantically the opposite of euphoria is medically recognized as a cognitive and emotional state in which a person experiences intense feelings of dissatisfaction, and in some cases indifference to the world around them.

Although dysphoria is an effect, the term is also used colloquially to define a state of general melancholic unhappiness such as that of mild depression [] [] often combined with an overwhelming sense of discomfort and malaise. However, it can also occur during a stimulant's offset and during the withdrawal symptoms of almost any substance. Cognitive euphoria Main article: Cognitive euphoria Cognitive euphoria semantically the opposite of cognitive dysphoria is medically recognized as a cognitive and emotional state in which a person experiences intense feelings of well-being, elation, happiness, excitement, and joy.

It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of opioids , entactogens , stimulants , and GABAergic depressants. However, it can also occur to a lesser extent under the influence of hallucinogenic compounds such as psychedelics , dissociatives , and cannabinoids. Compulsive redosing Main article: Compulsive redosing Compulsive redosing is defined as the experience of a powerful and difficult to resist urge to continuously redose a psychoactive substance in an effort to increase or maintain the subjective effects which it induces.

It can be partially avoided by pre-weighing dosages, not keeping the remaining material within sight, exerting self-control, and giving the compound to a trusted individual to keep until they deem it safe to return. Compulsive redosing is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as cognitive euphoria , physical euphoria , or anxiety suppression alongside of other effects which inhibit the clarity of one's decision-making processes such as disinhibition , motivation enhancement , and ego inflation.

It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of a wide variety of compounds, such as opioids , stimulants , [] [] [] GABAergics , [] and entactogens. This alteration predisposes a user to think thoughts which are no longer primarily comprised of words and linear sentence structures. Instead, thoughts become equally comprised of what is perceived to be incredibly detailed renditions of the innately understandable and internally stored concepts for which no words exist.

For example, if a person was to think of an idea such as a "chair" during this state, one would not hear the word as part of an internal thought stream, but would feel the internally stored, pre-linguistic and innately understandable data which comprises the specific concept labelled within one's memory as a "chair". These conceptual thoughts are felt in a comprehensive level of detail that feels as if it is unparalleled within the primarily linguistic thought structure of everyday life.

This is sometimes interpreted by those who undergo it as some "higher level of understanding". During this experience, conceptual thinking can cause one to feel not just the entirety of a concept's attributed data, but also how a given concept relates to and depends upon other known concepts. This can result in the perception that the person can better comprehend the complex interplay between the idea that is being contemplated and how it relates to other ideas.

Conceptual thinking is often accompanied by other coinciding effects such as personal bias suppression and analysis enhancement. It is most commonly induced under the influence of moderate dosages of hallucinogenic compounds, such as psychedelics and dissociatives. However, it can also occur to a lesser extent under the influence of entactogens , cannabinoids , and meditation. Multiple thought streams Main article: Multiple thought streams Multiple thought streams is defined as a state of mind in which a person has more than one internal narrative or stream of consciousness simultaneously occurring within their head.

This can result in any number of independent thought streams occurring at the same time, each of which are often controllable in a similar manner to that of one's everyday thought stream. These multiple coinciding thought streams can be experienced simultaneously in a manner which is evenly distributed and does not prioritize the awareness of any particular thought stream over an other. However, they can also be experienced in a manner which feels as if it brings awareness of a particular thought stream to the foreground while the others continue processing information in the background.

This form of multiple thought streams typically swaps between specific trains of thought at seemingly random intervals.

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But for you, it will be something different. It might be different for each post, depending on when you posted it. You can use variables in HTML just like regular text. How can we use this to our advantage? CSS class selectors match a name to an element. To begin, we will locate the div that contains our post in the HTML. Normally, this div contains ALL of the posts. Do not mistake this with the div we are looking for, which will be inside this div.

Then you are just unlucky. Thankfully, the CSS is much easier. First, pick a tag that you want to hide. Then just paste this code into the CSS:. When I arrived a group of first-graders were bring given a talking to about "swordfighting" with their sticks. The standard-issue lacrosse sticks, provided to the clinic by U. Lacrosse, a national lacrosse organization, dwarfed the six-year-olds so that they looked like little plastic toys running around, tripping over prop candy canes.

One teenager who arrived late looked like he'd been playing for a long time. His mohawk was dyed an ombre yellow-orange and he geared up with ease, one of the few to bring his own stick. He had been playing football and one of his coaches had suggested he try lacrosse, he explained, adding that he was immediately convinced during the first scrimmage.

When I watched him shoot on goal, it was evident that lacrosse had been the right choice. The clinic is run by Joe Nocella, architect, college professor, and owner of Cyclery , a bike shop in Gowanus, and his all-volunteer organization, Brooklyn Lacrosse. The organization was founded in and in its short two years has grown to over fifty volunteer coaches to spread among co-ed players.

Nocella began Brooklyn Lacrosse having played the sport himself all through middle and high school, then at Drexel University for a year after which he moved on to play at City College, where he is now in the hall of fame. The summer clinics are attended by girls and boys from schools all over the city, kids from each demographic and skill set, purposely held in areas like Brooklyn Bridge Park that are accessible by most subway lines. Brooklyn Lacrosse aggressively canvases parent organizations with blasts encouraging lacrosse as a sport that doesn't rely so heavily on height, build, or any acute athletic skill.

In the first boys' clinic of the summer, Nocella looked relaxed as he guided the sessions, blowing the whistle to signal transitions in play. He ably managed parents with their kids so that the kids could get to where they needed to go; the ones that showed up late were tossed into the fray with a stick and a finger pointed in the direction of their age group. After the players went through half of the sessions, the whistle blew again: break time. Fifty or so boys ran in our direction, scrambling for water or chatting with their parents, most of whom were sitting on a set of short bleachers on the sidelines, watching the drills, perplexed.

The high schoolers ran back on the field after guzzling water and started shooting on goal again. Watching the ease and fluidity of the kids' movements, as it paired with how naturally the clinic was run, made me feel like lacrosse had been played in New York all along. I broke my foot playing lacrosse in seventh grade. I had turned on it in the wrong way as I twisted to check the ball out of an opponent's pocket, pressing my foot into the hard cement tennis court.

I heard the top of my foot crack in three ways, and I knew immediately as I collapsed to the ground that I'd broken something. With two girls holding me up on either side, I limped to the school nurse. The incident had been part of my short growth as a lacrosse player, which began with my own clinic in fifth grade. I figured I'd go because so many people I knew in my town were athletic, and at that young age, the division between "nerd" and "jock" hadn't been established. My friend stole the tank years later and wears it to bed.

I don't blame her—it was really comfortable. After the foot-breaking incident I picked up lacrosse again when I was in eighth grade, as if I'd never stopped playing. The bones on the surface of my foot felt tender when I shuttled around on the field, learning how to weave in and out of the huge patch of cleanly cut grass that dressed the soft hills around my middle school. I wasn't that good, and never ended up getting that good, but, like any kid with extra energy to expend and a desire to find her place, lacrosse seemed like a natural use of my time.

My entire town was bonkers over the sport—our girls team was the best in the state several years in a row—and given our football team's horrible record, lacrosse was the default game to rally around and the most exciting to watch. Our Springfield Cougars were the most lauded athletes at our school, and though it wasn't exactly the same as the private prep schools the East Coast is lousy with, it resembled many other suburban high schools in the area: limited diversity, a mild entitlement complex, squarely middle class.

The urban lacrosse boom in New York, as I saw it unfold over ten years since my last game I traded in my stick for a trombone , had a different face. Previously reserved for the white and wealthy, lacrosse appeared to have grown among athletes of all races and social classes. It was now finally starting to look like a sport for everyone. New York University started its lacrosse team in , the very first collegiate team to appear in the country.

Lacrosse was a game played by Native Americans hundreds of years ago—with no pads, helmets, or nets—often as a way for tribes to problem-solve without resorting to fighting or violence. When there was a stalemate in decision-making within communities, Native Americans would take to the field and sort out conflicts there.

Predictably, when French colonizers arrived and saw the swiftness and grace of lacrosse , they took it as their own, beginning the earliest leagues in Canada and bringing it across the Atlantic for its first games in the mids. Those leagues then trickled down across the border, from Montreal and otherwise, making young America lacrosse's newest and most supportive home. In June of , the New York Times reported on the founding of the first National Lacrosse Association in New York: "A number of delegates from various lacrosse clubs came together at the Astor House last evening and formed a national association.

Certainly, an image of privilege—white, monied, male, dutifully educated, all old New York qualifiers—but the story ends with a precious quip. After all, lacrosse was as foreign to elite white men who bogarted it from the Native Americans as it was to anyone else.

Lacrosse was exciting and fast and athletically available. It's no wonder that it appealed. As institutions of higher learning reserved for white, rich men appropriated the sport into their closed-door worlds, lacrosse then ducked back into itself, becoming exclusive and foreign again to many. The Northeastern corridor saw the rise of lacrosse from the National Lacrosse Association's s beginnings into the twentieth and twenty-first centuries, dominating in storied universities like Johns Hopkins, Duke, Penn.

Lacrosse, with its French name, newly-required expensive equipment, and small but captive audience, developed into the ultimate prestige sport. It was a game for white people—white people with a lot of money. Lacrosse carries with it the totem of most things American—festering class conflict. Rightfully, news media has covered stories over the years of elite college lacrosse teams' hazing tactics , their entitlement complexes that all but encourage sexual assault on and violence against women , the inevitable privilege system that permits many college-level players to get away with bad behavior , and worse.

These stories will rightfully continue to arise, puncturing the joyous bubble that begins to inflate when any young kid finds themselves in love with a sport. It had been at least ten years since I had held a lacrosse stick, let alone played the game, and somehow the ease of using it never left me.

Cradling one on a Monday night a few weeks ago felt as natural as it did when I was fifteen. I'd come to practice with Central Lacrosse when I realized a gaping hole in my research: there appeared to be way more men in supply to talk about the sport than women.

Organizations like Brooklyn Lacrosse, CityLax, and the Brooklyn Crescents all give equal support to their girls' teams that they gave to their boys', but I speculated that, perhaps in the same way that baseball dominates while softball is played and poorly paid in the shadows, mens' lacrosse was given priority. After all, girls lacrosse is fundamentally different than boys lacrosse: less equipment, less brutal, but swifter and more like a game of soccer than a game of football.

Whitney Thayer, a program manager at CityLax where she works her day job before volunteering to play for Central Lacrosse at night , explained the ethos of their team: "We like to win, but we play more to let everyone play. It's a habit most lacrosse players display that comes off as a persistent nervous tick: the pocket, the thatched head of the stick that cradles the ball, must be perfect.

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